In Which I Get Pissed Off (how unusual)

I can cross taking the kids to the pediatrician for thrice monthly follow up visits off my list of things I plan on doing um, ever again.
We went to the GI specialist at Children's to see how Sydney has been doing. Back in September when Sydney was hospitalized due to asthma, the pediatrician there told us she'd like us to continue with our visits to various specialists. Everyone is concerned with Sydney's food allergies and weight/height ratios. Sydney's regular pediatrician agreed that being sure we have a strong handle on her food allergies, asthma and growth was a good plan.
Of course this means when we arrived today the GI specialist had no idea why we were there. I am arrogant and think my time is valuable so it was a little bit off-putting to hang out there answering the same questions I've been answering for three years now. In summary, Sydney has been tested for celiac, CF, among other things and as we all know, she's fine. My favorite part is when the specialist turns to me and says, "She's just a small child. You shouldn't be concerned". Um, hi there - I should not be concerned? I am not the one who started this whole "she's not growing" process for the sake of Pete. I am glad that she's growing again, she's at the 10th percentile for both weight and height coming in at 27.5 pounds and 3 ft tall. Still, the doctor thought it best to perform another RAST test (always an okay thing to do I suppose) and also to give Sydney the booster flu shot. Regarding the flu shot, boy is there a ton of misinformation/paranoia/annoyance about it. The nurse was pretty concerned that she could have an allergic reaction to the flu shot, the specialist not so much (because her skin test showed less than a 3 on the egg protein -- for those in the know--). She sat through both the flu shot and blood draw with nary a blink of the eye. Soon after we finished our pointless appointment we went down to eat lunch. I have no idea why but eating at Children's Hospital is one of Sydney's favorite things. Seriously. She sometimes asks if we can go there just to have dinner.
Anyway, as soon as we left the GI department and immediately after the flu shot and blood draw Sydney had an allergic reaction to the flu shot. As they gave her the shot they mentioned to me that we needed to watch her to see if she had a reaction, but they never mentioned where to go and what to do if that should occur. Shockingly, I was very level-headed and just let her finish her lunch and monitored her slow but steadily puffing cheeks and red splotches. I figured since we were about 20 yards away from the ER I could safely get her there should her reaction go from troubling to emergent. We finished lunch and she seemed to be better. Not wanting the situation to get worse in the car on the way home, I decided to head back up to GI (where they gave her the flu vaccine) to see if they wanted to check her out. I casually mentioned to the receptionist (after waiting patiently for my number to be called)(I'm not being sarcastic - for once I really was being patient) that my daughter seemed to have an allergic reaction to the flu shot. Big mistake. I should have said, "Hey I have a question for the nurse in the GI department from whom we recieved the flu vaccine" because the receptionist flipped the little red switch that made the code light flash. Kind of embarrassing as Sydney was happily sitting in a chair writing out her Christmas Wish List.
My point is, she's fine. It was a mild reaction as these things go, but we've been advised to seriously re-consider giving her a flu vaccine in the future. (As if I hadn't spent a ridiculous amount of time debating this very thing).
On a side note: Children's is not joking around with the H1N1. We were stopped as soon as we entered he hospital to be pre-screened for H1N1 exposure.

Again with the Two Things Unrelated...

For those of you who read this (the two of you) and work with me I ask that you keep mum about this posting.

Mark and I had a breakdown last night and we've decided I have to go back to work full-time. Long time followers of this blog might know that the issue of my returning to the work force has been a complicated one certainly. And let me be clear that my opinion toward working moms is quite favorable. Historically it just hasn't made any sense for me to work. I don't have any skills that would help me get a decent paying job. Contrary to popular belief, massage therapists don't make great money. And I've asked my boss many times if I can add hours and she's said no. So I have to find a job outside of the little 7 hour one I have now.
I have 13 years of retail experience (2 in "management"), 5 years as a massage therapist, and roughly 10 working as a receptionist. I also spent four years in the non-profit sector as a crisis phone operator and case manager. My resume includes random jobs such as: law school textbook reader for the blind, housekeeper (don't laugh - I can clean other people's homes just not my own), and a volunteer running hearing tests on infants (which I loved).
Then there is the issue of Sydney's food allergies and asthma and now the issue of finding a *good* daycare for two kids. And if I work full-time then the girls will be away all day, not just the length of my day at work or Mark's day at the office. We have to factor in drop-off and pick-up time, too. A good friend of mine, the only earner in her household of four, spends $2000 a month on childcare for two kids. She isn't one to send them to either the fanciest nor the scariest type of daycare. She also lives in a cheaper area of the state.
So - to sum up - I need to find a job that pays more than $2000 a month, a daycare with openings for two kids, and the ability to break Sydney's heart when I tell her we're pulling her from pre-school and ballet in order to send her to daycare.
Where do I begin looking? If this process takes 6 months to a year (as I've been told that's the timeline for finding a job in Seattle right now) should I still do it? Can I count on *someone to babysit when I need to go on an interview?
And more to the point, am I going about this wrong?

Randomly, if your child has asthma you can get a free storybook from this site. I ordered one just yesterday!

*Mark's mom.

I'm really tired of being broke y'all.

Mental Health, mine

I am walking through molasses today. The slower my progress from Point A to Point B the faster my kids move.
Sydney decided to stop peeing in the potty yesterday and today. Charlotte is generally mild-mannered unless her sister does something like oh, jump on her so there is the screaming soundtrack playing in a loop.
I think if I were working in an office setting, I would have called in today as a "Mental Health Day".

Mom Outfit - random observation

Has anyone ever noticed that moms in the Pacific Northwest seem to have a uniform? It consists of jeans, ribbed turtleneck, puffy-ish sateen vest (usually quilted in texture) over turtleneck, and some sort of boots paired with it. Am I wrong?

P.S.

Sydney's CF test results came back FINALLY. She has a 4% chance of having cystic fibrosis which is not enough of a percent to indicate we need further testing.

Resident of Hotness and Random H1N1 Conversation

Today I took Sydney into the pediatrician's office for a follow-up appointment to the follow-up appointment on Tuesday which was a follow-up appointment to Sydney's ER visit last Saturday.
Here's a tip for you: Next time the office asks if you don't mind seeing a resident instead of the doctor first say, "I will only talk to a resident who is rather unattractive. It helps me feel better about myself", because if your experience is anything like mine today you will appreciate it. I have to say, however inappropriate this is seeing that I am married, the resident was so good looking it was distracting for me. Nothing makes a frumpy mom feel worse about herself than a young, notsleepdeprived good looking resident. I digress.
The appointment went as expected. She's fine now and we are to stick with our usual treatment of her asthma as we have been up to now.
Our docs office is already out of the seasonal flu shot so she may not get her booster next week unless I can find a clinic without a long wait (ha!) or unless her asthma/allergy office can get us in (ha!). After some debate we decided not to stress on the H1N1 vaccine. She *is* more at risk of complications due to her asthma but even a cold will give her asthma. It's been decided that we'll give her the vaccine (which is made with egg proteins) only if Northwest Asthma & Allergy has it in their office the day we go in for our hospitalization follow-up. I'm not stressing out about it. Charlotte isn't getting the flu shot or the H1N1 as we don't know how bad her egg allergy is so we could end up hospitalized anyway.
It's all very confusing isn't it?

Asthma Update pt. 2

I took Sydney into her appointment this morning. As we arrived I see I
missed a call from her regular doctor that he made last night.
His voice mail said it was unnecessary to bring her in. Too late!
The doc we saw said she was still wheezing and gave her another dose
of an oral steroid, dexamethasone. She then proceeded to ask why
Sydney wasn't on a different control inhaler like Singulair to which I
said it was my understanding that Singulair contains milk.
Since she didn't know if that was true and didn't want to look it up (because it would interfere with the specialists prescription apparently) we've been referred back to NW Asthma and
Allergy. Of course.
They gave us one more dose of dexamtheasone and one to take home to be
given tomorrow.
The doc lent us a nebulizer. I learned that a nebulizer
dose of medicine is the same as the inhaler dose; in theory if the
inhaler isn't going to work then neither will the nebulizer. The only
difference is that the neb blows the medicine around so squirmy
three-year-olds might get more of the medicine this way than if they
sit there with the inhaler spacer & mask on their face. Of course,
Sydney is very patient with the mask and will sit to take it with no
problems. Maybe the nebulizer is the answer regardless.
On Thursday, we have a follow-up appointment to today's follow-up appointment. And we still are supposed to go to NW A & A at some point. I just have to schedule it and hope they'll see us without a referral. Usually there is a waiting list to get in of up to two months.
The doctor and I discussed the culprits for this most recent attack. I explained that I do the best I can to make sure she is not in contact with any of her allergies. We aren't able to control it hugely at school*; I can't control everything. I still want her to be active but when it rains we keep her in doors for movie days/nights and game time with the family. I wash all of our clothes in allergen-free detergent. I am told many times over that sometimes the rainy season just causes asthma attacks. I still find myself question why this is happening without any control. The rate of babies with asthma is much higher if they've been born via C-Section. Is that the reason? I can't help but question why: Why does she have allergies? And eczema? And asthma? How do I not blame myself (or Mark who also has these but to a much lesser degree)?

*Did I mention I just learned her school is not peanut/nut free as I was told?

They Know Us By Name

There is still no word on the CF test. As I've said, I doubt she has it, but it would be nice to get the damn results back from six weeks ago. I've called and been the squeaky wheel but to no avail.
Saturday we enjoyed another visit to Children's ER for an asthma attack. This time we took her much earlier than we have in the past hoping that by doing so we'd avoid an overnight stay. Her oxygen level was within normal limits (93) when we arrived but she had some "squeaks" in her breathing. We had plans later that afternoon to go out on a date for our 7th wedding anniversary and Mark's parents were supposed to babysit. Because they don't turn their cell phones on unless they are expecting a call (why is this again?) they never got our message that we were headed to the ER.
For once we packed as if we were going to spend a week at the hospital. Even though we had too many things with us, we were not in need of anything either, which was quite helpful.
All four of us arrived at the hospital ER and realized it was a bad idea to bring in Charlotte when there is so much swine flu going around. Since she hasn't had the vaccine to either swine or seasonal flu it's possible our visit would be a bad idea. All we could do was wait for Mark's parents to show up and take her with them back to our house.
Once we went back into our room it became obvious that we didn't need to stay the night. She had an oral steroid (dexamethasone this time instead of prednisone) and only 4 rounds of albuertol before we went home.
Again, they said she doesn't need a nebulizer.